


all your flaws and scars are mine.

by KingLear



Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, E AND R LOVE EACH OTHER ALOT, Hopeful Ending, Jaded Enjolras, M/M, Manly Tears, PWP, Past Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Pttht i can't write smut, Rough Sex, Smut, Sort of? - Freeform, Topping from the Bottom, Unresolved Issues, Unresolved Tension, and another thing, that are solved offstage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-02
Updated: 2016-10-02
Packaged: 2018-08-13 06:35:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,117
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7966300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KingLear/pseuds/KingLear
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In all the years that Grantaire left Enjolras behind, he'd never would have expected E to fade.</p>
            </blockquote>





	all your flaws and scars are mine.

**Author's Note:**

> Letting yall know that I hate myself. (i've got ten thousand pieces of hw due and also a handful of exams all week that i need to revise for and im choosing to write this instead).
> 
> Songs:  
> Still Falling For You - Ellie Goulding  
> Let It All Go - Birdy + Rhodes  
> Say You Love Me - Jessie Ware  
> Animals - Maroon 5

* * *

"Why don't you smile anymore, E?" Grantaire asks, eight years older, eight years happier, fingering the sobriety chip hanging on his necklace that had lasted for so many years. He knows that he has a good chance of getting shut down; it wasn't like he and E were close friends who shared their deep, emotional affairs with each other. Hell, even before he left, they were always necking it at each other's throats, words ready at the hilt.

He wasn't really expecting for Enjolras to answer honestly but he couldn't help himself.

In all the years that Grantaire had known Enjolras (and in the years that he had left), Enjolras had always seemed too bright, too untouchable from the rest of them, passionate even on the days that everyone felt like giving up, a piece of work that God had crafted with each careful stroke of the hand. As far as Grantaire could remember, Enjolras was in every way perfect, he had the tact of a person who held all the trump cards close to their chests and the charisma of every lying politician. But... The man in front of him had changed. Not in the ways that were detrimental to the public's well being but in the ways that... really counted for those who knew Enjolras, the friend and not Enjolras, the politician.

For one, in the entire week that Grantaire had been back, Enjolras hadn't genuinely smiled once and Grantaire knew because he'd been reverting back to his ways of watching E like a hawk whenever he could. (Sue him, he'd never  _really_ gotten over Enjolras and it wasn't like he was actively harming anyone but himself by going back to his unhealthy ways. Besides, he was only staying for another week.) The politician had been giving his faux smiles, the ones that he gave during interviews and press conferences when things weren't going his way. Enjolras had also been rubbing his temples, taking too many painkillers, downing one too many drinks, a behaviour that younger Enjolras would have never indulged in, a behaviour that Enjolras had tutted at him for, plenty of times. Safe to say, Grantaire was more than just  _curious,_ he was  _worried._

But instead of scowling and ignoring Grantaire, as would have been typical; Enjolras stopped typing on his laptop and then raised and fixed his calm and curious gaze on the artist, really looking at Grantaire for the first time since the Les Amis' long-awaited reunion. Grantaire almost blushed and looked down before he caught himself - he would  _not_ be deterred by E's perfected stare. 

"What are you talking about, R." Enjolras said, didn't really ask, eyes boring into R's face. "I've been smiling plenty."

"Well, not really." Grantaire retorted, slightly shaking his head with a sarcastic grin. "I know your genuine smiles from the ones that you have to give to the media." Then he wanted to suplex himself off a boulder. Fuck, he'd just revealed that he still stalked Enjolras on social media. Fuck, fuck,  _fuck._

But Enjolras didn't break into a scream, he didn't run away to get a restraining order on Grantaire for being a creep, instead he did something that Grantaire would have never expected. A smirk tilted Enjolras' lips as he now stared at the artist that had abandoned their Cause, with amusement instead of the deliberate apathy of before. "I didn't know that you cared, Grantaire." Enjolras uttered, shifting the laptop on his lap on to the table in front of him. 

"I don't." Grantaire automatically replied but then receded at the raise of E's eyebrow, "Sorry, I mean. I do. I never stopped caring about you or anyone in Les Amis."

"Gee, I would have never guessed by how quick you legged it when you could to abandon our Cause." Enjolras sniped but he said it without the heat that Grantaire would have expected, spreading his arms on the velvet of the couch, cocking his head with an intense gaze. Grantaire shifted his feet, looking away from the tantalising stare that had thickened with lidded interest. He fought to not lick his lips and gulped as thinly as he could. 

"Just because I left doesn't mean I didn't care." Grantaire argued, "I needed to take care of myself and being part of a group that were arrested on a daily basis was not a good thing to hang on my psyche." 

"And who told you that? Your therapist?" Grantaire wasn't sure if Enjolras' tone was mocking or not. The man finally stood up and Grantaire took an involuntary step back, neck snapping up at the height difference, straining to meet the blond's darkening eyes.

"No, I went away on my own." Grantaire felt his neck cramping from his effort of looking dead square into E's cool ice eyes. 

Enjolras looked down at him and his lips curved slightly downwards, "Why would you choose to leave us?" The 'why would you choose to leave me' was unspoken but Grantaire heard it all of the same. Grantaire swallowed, feeling the dryness in his throat. 

"Come on, it wasn't like you would have really missed me, I didn't even contribute much less anything to the group except humour and drinking problems." Grantaire tried to joke, fiddling his fingers on the edge of his coat.

"Was that for you to decide?" Enjolras smiled, emptily. Grantaire had never felt more smaller.

"Look, all I did was disrupt you guys from focusing on your ideas. I didn't really matter." Grantaire looked down, insecurities that he'd gotten over had a funny way of reappearing and rewounding him in the presence of Enjolras.

He felt a firm, rough hand tilting his chin upwards, "Stop talking like that about yourself, you were one of the main reasons that I looked forward to Les Amis meetings." Grantaire blinked rapidly, feeling his heart thumping as he could count the freckles on Enjolras' face and the shades of blue in his eyes. 

"What-what are you doing, E?" Grantaire tried to move but was held still by the hand gripping his chin and the stern gaze in E's eyes. 

"Something that I didn't have the courage to do, before." Enjolras grabbed Grantaire's waist with a tight grip and pulled him flush tight against his slender and lightly muscled body. Replacing the hand on Grantaire's chin to the artist's messy hair, Enjolras tugged it so that Grantaire's neck arched perfectly out for him to lavish the bare flushed skin with biting kisses, leaving Grantaire's stomach to tumbles and flips that he'd rarely ever felt, squeezing his toes together to keep himself from going afloat. He couldn't help the whines spilling out of his mouth as he tried to break from E's grip to kiss him on the lips but whined once more as the grip on his waist teetered on to painful. 

"Enjolras, plea- AH!" Grantaire yelped as Enjolras broke the sensitive skin on his neck, his hands wandering down to fondle the underside of his cheeks and Grantaire breathed out deeply as E's grip loosened up enough for Grantaire to rest his head on Enjolras' chest, muffling his whimpers into them, frustration filling his southern regions. Grantaire clenched onto the edges of Enjolras' polo, rubbing his crotch side by side with the taller male's. They both let out groans as Enjolras pulled Grantaire closer against the unmistakable hard outlines of their dicks. 

"Please, please, E." he rasped, desperate for something more than just heavy rutting and teasing touches. 

"I'm sorry, what did you want?" Enjolras smirked, more hints of amusement as his slender fingers lightly teased the areas of bare skin. 

"Pl-please. More." Grantaire whined, looking up at Enjolras with desperation as he bit down on his chapped lips when Enjolras nudged his face into Grantaire's soft bird's nest.

"You're going to have to be a bit clearer on that, Grantaire." Enjolras rested his chin on top of Grantaire's head and Grantaire - he could picture the smug grin on Enjolras' face as Grantaire willingly gave up. "More of what?"

"More cake? More laughter? More what?" Enjolras' voice went throaty as he grinded against the other's hard clothed shaft. 

"Fuck off!" Grantaire gritted his teeth as he felt a fever break out everywhere, barely aware of anything but also aware of _everything_. 

"No, I think I'd rather fuck you," Enjolras chuckled.

"Please." 

"Ask nicely and I'll think about it." 

Enjolras was a charming man who had the capabilities of a being a _terrible_ sadist! A sadist! And Grantaire was only a tiny bit weak as he moaned out, " _Please_ fuck me, Enjolras, please." 

The blond leader smirked with confidence, "I thought you'd never plead."

With the energy of young prepubescent teens, Grantaire and Enjolras began taking off each other's shirts, walking backwards towards the leather couch whilst trying to keep friction on their dicks and spare hands on each other. Enjolras pushed Grantaire on to the softness and Grantaire ran a warm hand up Enjolras' cold muscled skin as the latter shivered at the touch, toying with the other's sensitive pink nipples. 

Enjolras reluctantly batted away the artist's hands, helping with the effort of taking off Grantaire's pants and simultaneously grabbing the lube and condom that Courf stored underneath the couch. He breathed out heavily as he saw the purple head leaking pre-cum and couldn't help himself as he licked the head with curiosity and lathered copious amounts of lube into his fingers as he began to circle the little hole that twitched with anticipation. As Enjolras took the root of the dick down his throat, he pushed a finger into the warmth depth as Grantaire choked on his gasp and decided to bare his neck on the back of the leather sofa. 

"E-Enjie!" Grantaire yelped out, whimpering as one finger was pushed halfway in and retracted, the motion shallow and  _not enough_.

"I will replace you with my dildo, I swear to god, Enjolras!" He wildly thrusted up, almost gagging the blond revolutionary; the blond popped the head out of his lips (shut up, Grantaire did  _not_ whine in disappointment, he did  _not._ ) Pressing a bruising grip on R's hip, Enjolras gritted his teeth and began sucking punishing love bites into the inside of the artist's thighs, finally pressing in the forefinger with expertise. "Try it and I'll stop all of this." Enjolras murmured into Grantaire's skin. One finger turned into a scissor of two and soon enough Enjolras was skillfully skating around R's prostrate, almost there but not quite enough, enough to make tears mist his eyes. "Hah. What are you going to do, fuck me senseless?" Grantaire snarked and gasping as the leader pressed down on his prostrate and -  _please, please, please, oh God._

"Exactly." Enjolras bit back, looking back proudly to see a darkening hicky that would surely stay for at least a week. 

Grantaire's litany of 'please's made him blissfully unaware of the leader ripping the condom packet open with his teeth, methodically putting it on his dick, hard enough to stand upright on its own, thicker in girth and just slightly above average. Slowly by slow, the fingers were removed with a delicate touch until Grantaire was suddenly so  _empty and where did you go, Enjolras? Come back._

He twitched into the empty air, hooded eyes and bitten red lips that watched the leader lift himself off the ground and flip their positions over so that Grantaire was now suddenly sitting on Enjolras' lap and the leader's golden curls were splayed with a hint of perspiration. Grantaire hiccuped in surprise and Enjolras' face spread open in a wide manic grin.

"Didja think I was going to do all the work?" Enjolras snorted, leaning forward to run a finger along Grantaire's curls and accidentally brushing their hardened dicks together.

 _"FUCK." "ENJ."_ They'd both shouted at the same time and Enjolras had to grip Grantaire by the hips to stop him from moving his hips just like  _so_ and making him cum into the condom, like a premature idiot. " _Hah._ If you don- don't. Stop doing that, I'll leav-leave you here like this." Enjolras bluffed, gritting his teeth to restrain himself.

"No!" Grantaire rasped, butting E's neck and resting his head on the giant's chest as he reached behind him to part open his hole so that the tip could stuff itself in his entrance, a shiver running through his spine in starving anticipation.

He could feel every second that it took for the tip to slide in, the wait as he felt his stomach fall from  underneath him, feeling every halted breath that Enjolras took vibrate from the other's chest. Grantaire's eyes rolled back as he felt himself be so  _full up, finally_ and he couldn't help but twitch around E's cock in excitement, the muffled groan pulled from E's lips were sweet like music to his ears but he couldn't but help feel like he should  _talk about something_.

Everything was perfect, yes, every time that Enjolras pulled and twisted just like that, it had made him see stars that lit up Enjolras' predatory eyes. But he could still see the faint exhaustion built up underneath Enjolras' the line of his eyes 

"Enjie." He breathed out, lifting his head from Enjolras' chest, only to place his warm hands on E's cooler chest. (He could feel the slight shiver that ran down E's spine, he swore he could.)

"What's wrong, why a-aren't you, happy?" He looked into the sky blue eyes that reminded him of the sunshine and light rays after a bad storm, it was like belonging and home all wrapped up in one Enjolras giftbox.

"What are you talking about." Enjolras evaded, twisting his hips so that they collided against his prostrate with each punctual stroke of his cock. They both groaned and fell against each other.

"Stop evading the t-topic." Grantaire whined, pressing a light kiss on E's jaw. "Courf told me that you rarely go out any-anymore and that you h-hardly tell any of Amis wh-what's going on in you-your mind."

"Courf. Should. Mind. His. Own. Business." Enjolras growled, fed up with the slow pace that was slowly driving him insane. (Distraction, distraction.) Grantaire wailed and joined their bodies together, wrapping his arms and legs around his Apollo and never letting go; imprints of fingernails appearing on E's sculpted back.

"He, he cares for you, E!" Grantaire yelled out, meeting the other leader thrust for thrust, "A-and honestly, I'm a li'l worried tooo."

Enjolras didn't reply for a long time, simply putting his all into the thrusts so hard that they rocked the leather couch with squeaks, biting viciously on his lip until it bled and he could feel the sting of tears in the corner of his eyes. 

Grantaire could feel his release approaching and whimpered into E's shoulders, pressing kisses into the leader's collar bones. 

"You weren't there." Enjolras finally murmurs into Grantaire's hair, and if R hadn't been really listening he would have missed the hesitant words, E delicately touching his hips and allowing a few harsh breaths to escape his lips.

"Fuck, Enj, I'm going to come!" Grantaire groaned and if he had been looking, he would have seen E looking down at him in adoration, something loud and quiet and fierce.

"Do it." Enjolras gruffly said, "Come for me, Grantaire." 

And he did. The words sink under his skin and he can feel them embedding sweetly like the captive lover's embrace he's in; his spine straightens out as he feels the orgasm explode out of him and the rocking motion of Enjolras' dick slamming in and out of him, his hole squeezing around the pull of the dick, threatening to never let go. His mess sprays in between them, messing up E's pristine polo shirt and landing on his own skin, almost scalding. 

Enjolras rolls his hips and R is a limp doll, letting E do what he wanted as he enjoyed the high sensations that thrummed, he hums under his breath as he awaits the inevitable release that occurs with one final brutal stroke that causes his own dick to weakly twitch at the pleasurable sensation and then E is bent over wrapped around the artist, tears muffled into the artist's hair. Grantaire feels warmth spread and briefly smiles as he plays with the buttons on the leader's shirt, startled when he feels the shakes rumble around him.

"E?" Grantaire says gently, trying to lift his head and look at the leader.

"No." Enjolras whimpers, tugging the artist back on his chest, unwilling to let him go. "Please don't leave."

The words crumple something inside of Grantaire and he struggles but he looks up, raising his hands to cup the leader's too-thin cheeks, dipping it down to engage eye-contact. "I'm not going to leave." Grantaire whispers to him, looks at the teardrops clinging on the Enjolras' glittering eyelashes and something inside him vows to stay. "I won't leave again."

"Liar, they all left too, just like you." Enjolras tried to look away but was stopped by the insistent touch. "I don't really blame you. I don't blame them." 

Grantaire knows what E is talking about. Over the years, Les Amis had drifted apart, as it was wont to do, each integral member following their different passions (Les Amis had started out as a club and not a political party) and then the promise of meeting up every so often had trickled down to once every few years until the only original member left was Enjolras. Grantaire felt his heart break. How long had Enjolras felt like this?

It only served to strengthen his resolve as he spoke up with determination, "The years have brought me back to you for a reason. Let me help you, E, you've been alone for too long."

As he said it outloud, he could feel E's grip tighten on his hips. 

"I've forgotten how to share responsibility." E's voice sounded thick with tears and R bit his lip, rising up to place a gentle and loving kiss on the vulnerable leader. He tasted the saltiness of Enjolras' tears on his lips as they touched the tips of their noses together.

"All I want you do to is stay." Enjolras remarked and R would later privately take some time to let the words wash by him as he felt the giddiness run down his spine. 

"I will." R replied and they nuzzled each other with content, R reaching down to lace their fingers together.

Maybe everything hadn't been resolved but it wasn't as if there wasn't later to talk about things. For now, they would sit there in silence and bask in the warmth of each other. 

**Author's Note:**

> idk man, i really love jaded enjolras. i know fandom wants him to always b passionate and same but burnt out enjolras is fun 2 write idk because it just reminds ppl that ye e can handle a lot but yall smts ferget that he is also a human* not actually a god (unless u write him as a god then/ yeah.)  
> ofc r would pick the time where e literally has his dick shoved up his asshole to talk abt feelings and also i love writing stories where e is just as in love with r and.... yea  
> edit: also my work didn't save and id written a huge amount on it and i was just procrastinating whilst writing this sooooooo this took a while.


End file.
